Mary D. Davis

Out of arrogance and anger...

My journey into chaplaincy and CPE supervision has its roots, as it does for many persons entering ministry, in the death of a family member. I was 15 years old when my older sister died. The contrived and empty comments so typically given in grief situations did not sit well with me. In the arrogance of adolescence and through the anger stage of my grief I made a vow “to learn how to minister to people and teach others how to do it better”.

To that end, I embarked upon an undergraduate degree in theology. Not being allowed to study in a Catholic seminary in the early 1970s, I studied at a Catholic university and supported myself by working as a unit secretary in a local hospital. Drawn to the patients and families in their crises, I was challenged by my nursing supervisor to “get on one side of the desk or the other”. Someone referred me to CPE, which was tailor-made for me – I did not want to abandon my love of theology, but clearly needed practical ministry skills.

Six units of CPE in acute care and mental health settings landed me a chaplaincy job. I tell people now that I spent the first years of my chaplaincy work explaining to people that “yes, laypeople/women/people my age can be chaplains”; at times, I was frustrated by wanting to minister yet spending so much time catechizing in regard to the Catholic church and concepts of ministry.

A year into my first position, I was diagnosed with malignant melanoma. Thinking I might not have all the time in the world led me to recognize that while I loved bedside chaplaincy, I found more energy in helping others gain ministry skills and learn about themselves as ministers. I took on completion of a Master’s degree in theology, Supervisory CPE units and eventual certification at age 30, a husband, and births of three children.

Twenty seven years later, my ministry within pastoral care and education, along with my vocation as a wife and mother, continues to be an incredibly fulfilling and blessed life.